Archive for category Funny

Stop using your great grandfather’s vocational assessment

What do you want to be when you grow up?

As kids, we were asked that all the time, and I bet no one answered, “information security analyst,” “operations research analyst” or “web developer,” just a few of the top jobs for 2016.

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When counselors direct high school students to vocational assessments today, students might still not be able to mention those specific careers, only because they don’t know the wide variety of options out there. And that’s the problem with current high school vocational assessments: they don’t point kids in the right direction for modern career paths.

The most-used high school vocational assessment is the “Strong Interest Inventory®” assessment. At $200 a pop (or the price of a Chromebook), you have to wonder how widely used it is, and from my consumer product marketing background, that calls into question the “scientific validation” they tout.

How relevant can it be if a wide cross section of people haven’t taken it? MySpace and Facebook are both social networks, but can anyone argue that MySpace has any insights into consumer or social trends since no one uses it?Even the name sounds old-fashioned, and there’s a reason for that.

The Workforce When SII Was Born

The SII was developed in 1927 to assist military men returning from World War I looking for work. Let’s paint a little picture of what the world looked like then. First of all, there were only 119 million people, and as you might imagine, the typical worker was a white male.

No surprise, the top job was manufacturing, and Henry Ford was offering Southerners $5 a day to come to work in the emerging auto industry. (“Women and negroes” not welcome, the ads said.)

And that pay scale actually doesn’t sound bad when you consider that “super-rich Americans” were those making about $10,000 a year.

The Workforce Now

In 2016 you might say the landscape looks just a little different. First of all, we’ve got 325 million of us – and growing. Top-paying jobs all involve STEM fields; in fact, at some companies, coders are writing their own paychecks.

Henry Ford’s amazing $5 a day offer? That can barely get you a coffee. He probably wouldn’t need to recruit people from outside of area, anyway, since current migration patterns are from suburbs to urban centers, where today’s young adults are less likely to want a car. And, those “women and negroes?” Well Mary Barra is CEO of Ford’s competitor General Motors, and our president is black. (The $5 was actually split 50/50 between pay and bonus!)

Super-rich Americans are counting their money in billions rather than thousands, and three of the top five earned their wealth through technology-based companies.

The whole world is available on the smartphones we carry in our pockets, instantly updated rather than relying on the printing press and newspaper of 1927.

Ch…ch…changes

When you consider the evolution (or rather revolution) that has taken place in the workforce since the SII was introduced, it makes that assessment seem pretty quaint doesn’t it?

To be fair, the SII was updated in 2012, but four years in today’s world seems like an eternity: We were still using the iPhone 4 and Snapchat was just a ghost of an idea. The IoT, smart homes and fitness trackers were all just becoming part of our vernacular. And wrap your mind around this: Adele was blowing us away with her first album, and we were gaga for Gangnam Style. (Sorry, I know that’s in your head now.)

That’s why many career counselors and educators are wondering if there’s something more accessible and more current out there in the world of high school vocational assessments to help address today’s career path discovery and education planning.

A tool that hasn’t just evolved, but that has been created specifically to fit the needs of today’s workforce. An instrument that takes into account our growing expectation of work/life balance, telework and the gig economy. One that is not cost-prohibitive in a world where freemium is the norm.

At Vireo Labs, we believe there is a better way for all high schoolers to assess their potential. And, we look forward to keeping you updated.

– Jose Mallabo

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Driving member growth: Sometimes it pays to be direct

When I was leading international corporate communications at LinkedIn in 2009-2010, we knew interaction between members was critical to driving growth in the overall member base. Critical to that was a singular act on the platform: Completing and updating your profile. The problem was most people only updated their profiles when they were about to look for a job. I was more than a little obsessed with driving that objective (See number 8 on this post), particularly in international markets where our member base was fast-growing, but relatively small compared to the U.S.

In India we had garnered national press coverage simply by announcing our presence in Mumbai — which helped further accelerate membership growth in that country. That gave us fodder for making more and more milestone announcement: “LinkedIn India surpasses 3 million members” then 4 million members, then 5 million. Like any news cycle, it gets salty quick and you have to be more inventive and sometimes what George Constanza did — the opposite.

Given our top priority was to get people to update their profile, I figured why not just ask them to do that directly? After all, we messaged members directly all the time. (Sometimes, the greatest clarity comes from being awake for 30 straight hours and staring at a hotel room ceiling 10,000 miles away from home.)

Screen Shot 2015-04-25 at 1.36.33 PMUntil then we’d been using press coverage and the buzz it created to drive member growth. To announce our 6 millionth member in India, we decided to announce the news directly to the membership base and let them carry it to the mainstream media — along with a tip to complete your profile.

Results:

  • Day 1 – 15,000 updated profiles
  • Day 2 – 30,000 updated profiles
  • Press coverage hit more than 5 million impressions
  • Cost of distribution: Zero Rupees
  • Prep and writing time: 2 hours (one hour was spent just explaining it and 15 minutes spent on discussing the button)
  • Authenticity to the company mission and product purpose: Like a glove

In the weeks after this tactic, my PR colleagues started looking at LinkedIn the platform for what is today — the world’s most powerful business medium for professionals.

– Jose Mallabo 

 

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Top 5 things I am looking forward to at San Diego Comic-Con 2014

On July 26 SCAD’s Sequential Art program will be hosting a small booth-like presence across the street from Comic-Con in San Diego at the Wired Cafe at the Omni Hotel. Having lived in San Diego back when Comic-Con wasn’t quite the socio-entertainment global geekfest that it is today — I am really looking forward to the trek from Savannah to the place I called home for so long. But mostly I am looking forward to:

  1. Unleashing a small squadron from my dusty fleet of cool and slightly off-putting t-shirts and calling it business attire. On day 1 of the conference I will either wear my “I’m not sleepy, I’m Asian” or my “Brown Man Rising” shirt. Tweet suggestions to @josemallabo.
  2. Seeing and hearing what 130,000 geeks, celebrities, media, groupies and doodlers looks and sounds like so I can finally answer the question that’s been playing in my head for years: “Who would win in a street fight between fans of Comic-Con and the Super Bowl?” My money is on Comic-Con not because they outnumber Super Bowl attendees almost 2-to-1, but because they’ve conceived an alternate reality where wearing capes isn’t weird and super powers exist.
  3. Being in a group of people where I know without a shadow of a doubt that I’m not the only one who has ever worn a Lieutenant Uhura uniform (replete with the wig and ear piece.) 
  4. Chilling out at Wired Cafe with all the entertainment muckety mucks to see if someone will finally admit to me that the Oscar for Best Picture awarded to The English Patient was a result of a lost bet.
  5. Just being in San Diego — home for one of my alma maters and the place where I’ve consumed the most quesadillas after 2 a.m.

Good things to know if you’re going to Comic-Con  

Black Widow

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Day 1 in Kathmandu

Fifteen hours after arriving in Kathmandu I thought it was a good time to check out the sites and get my bearings. And maybe figure out how to ride a motorcycle through Nepal.

I hired a driver out of the Summit Hotel to shuttle me around first to Swayambhunath Stupa (i.e. the Monkey Temple) then to the Thamel area to see where the tourists do their touristy things. As I was strolling through busy streets full of cars, people, bicycles and motorcycles moving in just about every direction one thought came to mind:

How exactly am I going to ride a motorcycle out of here in two days without hitting something?

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13 Signs you might be an Internet entrepreneur

13. You know the up and down connectivity speeds to your house

12. You can rattle off your IP address faster than your SSN

11. Your focus and visualization skills are good enough to make beef jerky taste like steak

10. You keep your house at 68 degrees Fahrenheit to keep the server comfortable

9. Before you go to bed you move the laundry to make room for your iPad and laptop

8. When you travel, the first question in the morning is to your co-founder sleeping across the room: “Dude, what’s the Wi-Fi login?”

7. When you travel, you stay in the kind of hotel where your car is parked right outside the door

6. You know the current time in Delhi and today’s date but have no clue what day of the week it is

5. You think Tom’s Shoes is a great authentic story of doing social good but wouldn’t wear them

4. You know the exact cost of your healthcare coverage and what’s included – or read this and realized you don’t have any

3. Your mom sends you links to some site called Monster.com

2. You miss @arrington

Number 1 sign you might be an Internet entrepreneur:  All of the above is pretty much how you planned it except Arrington leaving TechCrunch. Still miffed about that one.

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On the 4th of July don’t be a picky eater!

There’s this great New Yorker cartoon of two women sitting at a meal.  One woman says to the other:

“I started my vegeterianism for health reasons, then it became a moral choice, and now it’s just to annoy people.”

The fondest memories I have growing up weren’t of going to Disney Land or road tripping up the California Coast in the Oldsmobile Vista Cruiser (see the car from That 70’s Show).  It was of hanging out with my family at a park in Long Beach on July 4th, 1976 — and every 4th of July after that.  For the bicentennial, I wore some crazy red-white-and-blue plaid Garinamals outfit that looked like a wardrobe in a blender. My cousins were in the Navy and lived with us and it was so cool to hang out with them and tell other kids “they’re in the Navy!”  In my head, that won me some social cred points.

What I remember most was the food.

It didn’t matter what the holiday was, what the state of the economy was, whether my parents had money or not — the spread was always big, always Filipino and anyone was welcome to it. My food is your food.

Straight out-of-the-ocean crabs, pancit, fried fish, rice, lumpia, dinuguan and desserts that challenge my Tagalog to remember. And if we were ‘lucky’ one of my aunts would bust out the much fabled-Filipino style spaghetti — yes, it has cut up hot dogs in it. I remember kids from other picnics at the park coming over and trying our food — some of them liked it, some ran back to their picnics thinking WTF was that?

My parents went through a lot to get to the the US and become citizens — and left a lot of family behind. But the food comes with us.

As my California-Northeast-Filipino palate woofed down some Southern inspired cooking today and sipped on sweat tea, I remembered those meals and this New Yorker cartoon and realize just how much picky eaters annoy the living crap out of me.

Picky eating is a first world problem. People in the developing world aren’t turning down hamburgers because there is a tomato on it and it annoys me when people do that. And no one ever died saying “golly gee, I sure am glad I never tried that plate of . . . that nice man offered me.”

The Fourth of July is the celebration of this country’s birthday — a birthday of immigrants and their food.  So when you’re at that park BBQ or picnic reach over and grab a piece of something new or something you might even call foreign on any other day of the year.  Remember, your exotic is someone else’s normal.  Grab a little exotic even if you are a picky eater. It’s the American thing to do.

You can go back to annoying me tomorrow.

Happy Birthday, America.

And thanks mom and dad. I’m grateful to be here, but now I’m hungry.

– Jose Mallabo

 

 

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Is this American Gothic 2.0?

This picture of Mark Zuckerberg and his new bride remind me eerily of American Gothic.

 

Add the pitch fork and Iowa. 🙂

 

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Social media complements search and email marketing (for now)

Looking at this Forrester post almost a year later feels a lot like going back to high school after your first year in college. You thought it was a good idea to visit but then you realize by the end of it — not so much.

The blog post’s conclusion is to draw your own conclusion about social media’s impact on holiday purchasing. The post meanders from having an opinion that the ForeSee research was limited to having no point of view whatsoever. How am I going to join a conversation or rebut your point of view if you don’t have one?

While there are no official rules to blogging – the universal and unspoken rule is to have an opinion.

Here’s mine: The idea of social commerce (buying stuff on Facebook) is still a pipe dream. Rather, social media can drive brand, product and deal awareness and therefore serve as a complement to a retailer’s larger search and email marketing programs.

Since this post in late 2010, LinkedIn and Groupon have gone public. Facebook’s IPO has been delayed – but will be the biggest one in the history of ever. The point being, these companies are all well capitalized, have hundreds of millions of subscribers and are not going anywhere. So industry pundits and luddites alike need to bite down on the reality that marketers will continue to throw marketing dollars at them to hock their wares regardless of whether we have any proof of a causal relationship between the social media consumption and clicking the “buy” button on a shopping site.

At 2.9% e-commerce conversion rates there is no proof needed.

While this question of “Was social media a big factor in holiday purchases?” will come up again and again over the next few weeks and months, I encourage marketers and PR people to do one thing:   challenge the question.

As Augie Ray correctly points out social media is a mere infant and it will take time to prove its correlation with purchasing behavior. In the meantime it serves a lot of other organizational needs that are no less important than shopping cart clicks. Don’t get suckered into the conversation about social media and its impact on transactions because you’ve got more to attend to with your 2012 social and media dollars such as:

  • Reputation management
  • Product and corporate branding
  • Influencer relations
  • Partner relations
  • Customer service
  • SEO
  • Issues management and crisis communications
  • Recruitment and workforce engagement

While the analyst community continues to look under the hood for purchase conversion evidence, what they’re missing is that the owners of these social media programs may not at all be focused on driving holiday (or non-holiday for that matter) transactions.

Pause.

Bite down. Chew. Gulp.

And therefore, there might be some reason why the transactional or purchase conversion evidence is not to be found.

In fact, most brands and retailers I know are still investing more in tried and true search and email marketing initiatives to drive transactions and conversion online and in stores –- while using Facebook and Twitter as complements to those initiatives and for all of the other communications objectives listed above. That explains why search and promotional email remain the primary drivers for purchasing behavior for the holidays.

There. I said it.

Don’t go back to high school. But do take my poll on LinkedIn

-Jose Mallabo

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Laker dissenters: Shhhh.

All season I’ve endured all the dissent and whining about how the Lakers are done.  How Kobe is no longer the man. With LeBron still choking at the end of every big game, I have one thing to say:  Shhhhhh.

The banners still hang at the Fabulous Forum.  And Kobe is still the best player on the planet.  If you need proof that the Lakers as a whole have some athleticism.  Click this and Ray Allen, get in my poster.

On a pass from the center Pau Gasol while Big Baby wonders "When do we eat?"

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Social Exuberance

I’ve lived through a couple of bubbles in my time – dot.com and housing come to mind, anyone?  And something tells me the longer I’m around the more I’m going to have to live through.

Is social media another one of them? Maybe. Is a market cap of $80 billion for Facebook rational? Alan Greenspan must be trying his damnedest to make those old thumbs Tweet #social-exuberance.

Exuberant smile? Greenspan retired a while ago.

It strikes me that my framed Pets.com certificates and my wall have more than a nail in common – both were worth a hell of a lot more when I bought them (yeah, that was a stretch, thanks for sticking with me on that one). So now that I’ve said it, let me compare the stock market bubble to the housing market bubble to see what these bubbles might have in common.

There are basically three ways to value a stock, and they are pretty much the same as how the real estate market valued my wall.

My house:

  • Price per square foot (adjusted for how nice the stuff in my square footage is)
  • How much an identical house in my neighborhood sold for
  • Make shit up

A stock:

  • Discounted cash flows (predictions of how much money a company will make in future years, adjusted for how fast they will grow and how long they might last)
  • What comparable “peer” companies are trading at (adjusted for cash, debt (including options), assets and risks)
  • Make shit up

Both Facebook and Amazon have market caps of around $80 billion ($82.9 billion secondary market estimate for Facebook on 1/28, $76.8 billion actual market cap for Amazon on 1/28).  So if they were houses, and I was pre-qualified for an $83 billion mortgage, I could take my pick (well, my wife would, let’s stay grounded here).

As far as revenues go, estimates for Facebook for 2010 are around $2 billion while Amazon is on track for something north of $30 billion. In housing terms, Facebook is listing a very funky two bedroom loft conversion while Amazon is listing a 30-bedroom ancestral estate. So, there are either some really, really nice upgrades in that loft or there are 28 secret bedrooms priced into the deal.

Yes, an $80 billion estimate for Facebook is likely high. And yes, Facebook and Amazon don’t have identical business models.  But yes, the same people who sold me Pets.com shares are the same people who collateralized my mortgage and are the same people selling Facebook shares to foreign investors to avoid SEC regulations.

That must be one amazing loft.  I need to go check it out, I do need more wall space.

-Reid Cox

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